Ever since I was a little girl and watched An American Tail (1986), I always would sit on my window sill at night looking up at the stars. No, scratch that! No matter where I was, or what I was doing, whenever the days would start to fade away and the stars would awaken the night sky, I always would look up at them. Now that I think back, I think it was because I may not have known a lot of things with great certainty, but whenever I looked up at the stars, I would dream! Dream of the days gone by, of days that have yet to be, or never were. No matter what I was going through in my life, I could always count on my dreams to save me.
When I came of age and got married, I didn't even realize it, but I stopped looking up at the stars, somehow stopped dreaming. I mean I still had dreams. I would dream of finishing school, starting a family,buying my first home, so on and so forth; but those were dreams of necessity or logic. They were not the dreams that you could get lost in for hours or make you have butterflies in your chest.
I reminisce on this childhood experience, because I was out on the town with my husband tonight and as we were driving home, I caught myself looking up at the stars and I started remembering what those stars meant to me. How they were a million wishes and prayers sent up to heaven to be answered. How they were the tears of pain and sorrow saved in heaven in remembrance. They were the light in my darkness and no matter where I was or how alone I felt, they were always there shining down on me and giving me hope for a better tomorrow. As I sat in the passenger seat of our car driving along on the highway of our life, I started thinking about those stars and wondering why I never looked up at them anymore? Did my life become so busy that I no longer have time to dream anymore? Were the stars just a childish notion that I grew out of as I have gotten older? Did I come to a point of definitive consciousness, where I said, "What's the point?"
I am not sure when or why I stopped, but I think it was around the time I got married. Reason being that when I married my husband, my whole life changed. Suddenly all those wishes and prayers that I would send up to the stars, finally came true, all of my tears and sorrow, turned into complete and utter joy and happiness. My husband became my light and I was always surrounded by him and darkness no longer existed. Because of that, I no longer needed to hope for a better tomorrow because every moment I was living was the best moment I thought I could ever experience. Don't get me wrong, by no means is my husband, or our marriage perfect, but the fact still remains, it is perfect for me! Though the stars are a wonderful after thought, I find that I no longer need to dream, because now my life is better than my dreams could ever be and I thank the Lord every day for such a wonderful gift in life he has blessed me with!...Until next time
Showing posts with label Bravery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bravery. Show all posts
Monday, April 4, 2016
Tuesday, December 2, 2014
What happened to Russhelle this time?
Hello my beloved friends! I know it's been awhile since I've chatted with you; truth be told, it's been another tough year for me and I've been spending the past couple of months just trying to keep it together.
I really don't even know where to begin except to say that I have had enough sorrow these past few years to last me forever! It seems like whenever life starts to look up for me, something always has to push me down?
As you probably have gathered in my previous blogs, things didn't really work out at the Post Office. I loved the environment and the people, it just wasn't something that I wanted to spend the rest of my life doing. All my life, I have known with conviction that my dedication is working with children, and if I were to stay at the Post Office, I know my dreams would have never of been realized, that and the job was just way out of my league! I mean, you have to be at your top physical shape, otherwise that workload is BRUTAL! After leaving the Post Office, my husband and I tried our hand at starting our own business doing what we did before which was medical billing and my husband contracted work against my wishes and his better judgement, with his sisters boyfriend. One of the individuals might I add that made my life a living hell at that horrible job that took so much away from me! Reluctantly, I agreed to work with him and after a couple of months, my husbands sister who doesn't like me very much decided she didn't want to be within the same proximity as me and convinced her boyfriend to end our contract, so again we were both out of work.
Frustrated, I decided I needed a break from the rat race and decided my husband need to take the reigns because I just didn't have it in me anymore.
My husband did find work and things looked like they were finally starting to get better, but then they decided to let him go and we were left scrambling for some solid ground again. At this point, I decided I needed to suck it up and get back out there, but all the jobs I wanted or felt like I qualified for demanded at least a B.A. which is why I decided to go back to school and finally finish.
But then I got sick and had to slow my roll way back, which is where I am at right now. I ended up in the hospital which is another blog, but it made me stop in my tracks and really think about my life and what was important and because of it, I had to give up a lot of things, such as volunteering so much. It saddened me, but I stepped down as Children's Ministry Coordinator while I figure out what's going to happen to me next? I stopped planning so many events, but most importantly I stopped worrying about the million and one things that are totally out of my control.
To be honest I think this is all the Lord's doing and I thank Him and give Him all the glory because it says in the bible:
"And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you." 1 Peter 5:10 ESV
and also, "Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love Him." James 1:12 ESV
I know that a lot of my blogs thus far have been pretty depressing and sad, but looking back and reading them, I can see more clearly now that the Lord is truly working in my life and I just praise Him at His mighty work because I know that He has a wonderful plan for me!...Until next time my beloved.
I really don't even know where to begin except to say that I have had enough sorrow these past few years to last me forever! It seems like whenever life starts to look up for me, something always has to push me down?
As you probably have gathered in my previous blogs, things didn't really work out at the Post Office. I loved the environment and the people, it just wasn't something that I wanted to spend the rest of my life doing. All my life, I have known with conviction that my dedication is working with children, and if I were to stay at the Post Office, I know my dreams would have never of been realized, that and the job was just way out of my league! I mean, you have to be at your top physical shape, otherwise that workload is BRUTAL! After leaving the Post Office, my husband and I tried our hand at starting our own business doing what we did before which was medical billing and my husband contracted work against my wishes and his better judgement, with his sisters boyfriend. One of the individuals might I add that made my life a living hell at that horrible job that took so much away from me! Reluctantly, I agreed to work with him and after a couple of months, my husbands sister who doesn't like me very much decided she didn't want to be within the same proximity as me and convinced her boyfriend to end our contract, so again we were both out of work.
Frustrated, I decided I needed a break from the rat race and decided my husband need to take the reigns because I just didn't have it in me anymore.
My husband did find work and things looked like they were finally starting to get better, but then they decided to let him go and we were left scrambling for some solid ground again. At this point, I decided I needed to suck it up and get back out there, but all the jobs I wanted or felt like I qualified for demanded at least a B.A. which is why I decided to go back to school and finally finish.
But then I got sick and had to slow my roll way back, which is where I am at right now. I ended up in the hospital which is another blog, but it made me stop in my tracks and really think about my life and what was important and because of it, I had to give up a lot of things, such as volunteering so much. It saddened me, but I stepped down as Children's Ministry Coordinator while I figure out what's going to happen to me next? I stopped planning so many events, but most importantly I stopped worrying about the million and one things that are totally out of my control.
To be honest I think this is all the Lord's doing and I thank Him and give Him all the glory because it says in the bible:
"And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you." 1 Peter 5:10 ESV
and also, "Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love Him." James 1:12 ESV
I know that a lot of my blogs thus far have been pretty depressing and sad, but looking back and reading them, I can see more clearly now that the Lord is truly working in my life and I just praise Him at His mighty work because I know that He has a wonderful plan for me!...Until next time my beloved.
Friday, March 15, 2013
My husband the hero!
There are many reasons why I love my husband, but one thing that always has me falling back in love time after time is how chivalrous he truly is. I have countless stories about how he put himself in harms way to protect and defend the innocent, but I don't think there is enough space in my blog to boast, so I decided to just tell you about what he did today instead.
We had a lovely day (despite this horrible rash I acquired on my face that is so itchy and making my life miserable), but that's another story, another day. We went to the happiest place on earth Disneyland and spent the day with our nephew, nieces and sister; it truly was a day to be had!
At the end of the day, after we dropped off our nephew, we decided to go shopping for a few needed household items at our local store and on our way back to our car, my husband stopped in his tracks and gasped, " oh no!" I had my eyes down and when I looked up and towards what he was staring at, there were two women in the street of the parking lot. One was an elderly woman laying on the ground and the other was a slightly younger woman (maybe her daughter or home health aide) trying to pick the elderly lady back up. On the sidewalk was a wheelchair that was half on the sidewalk, half on the street; Just then, a car was entering the lot coming towards them. After assessing the situation further and seeing the car coming towards them, my husband quickly handed me our shopping bags and ran towards the scene without any hesitation. I stood behind trying to figure out what was going on and as I looked around, I saw two other gentlemen running towards the women as well, but my husband was the first at the scene so only one of the other guys came over and held the wheelchair, while my husband and the younger lady helped the elderly woman back to her chair. Luckily, by this time, the car that was coming in the parking lot saw the situation as well and stopped in front of them and got out to see if he can also lend a helping hand. Fortunately, by this time, my husband, the other woman and the third stranger all were able to safely get the situation under control and the ladies out of harms way.
When I got closer to the scene, the younger lady was apologizing profusely to everyone and explained that she wasn't paying attention so she thought she was rolling the wheelchair down the slant of the sidewalk, when in actuality she rolled her off the curb, which I guess caused the wheelchair to dip and the elderly woman to fall out into the street. My husband offered to assist in pushing the wheelchair across the parking lot, but the younger woman just kept apologizing and saying she was okay. We walked back to our car, but with a watchful eye towards the two women which now seemed to be stopped behind a bush in the parking lot, where the younger lady was assessing the elderly woman to see if she was seriously injured. My husband said that the elderly woman was yelling at the younger one and that the elderly woman was complaining about her arm, but as we pulled out and started to leave the parking lot, we looked back and seen the two women walking back towards the store, while the younger lady kept rubbing the elderly women's shoulder.
We hope that she is okay, because I know how serious even the smallest falls can be for the elderly, but for now my husband was a knight in shining amour or at least in my eyes anyway!....until next time.
We had a lovely day (despite this horrible rash I acquired on my face that is so itchy and making my life miserable), but that's another story, another day. We went to the happiest place on earth Disneyland and spent the day with our nephew, nieces and sister; it truly was a day to be had!
At the end of the day, after we dropped off our nephew, we decided to go shopping for a few needed household items at our local store and on our way back to our car, my husband stopped in his tracks and gasped, " oh no!" I had my eyes down and when I looked up and towards what he was staring at, there were two women in the street of the parking lot. One was an elderly woman laying on the ground and the other was a slightly younger woman (maybe her daughter or home health aide) trying to pick the elderly lady back up. On the sidewalk was a wheelchair that was half on the sidewalk, half on the street; Just then, a car was entering the lot coming towards them. After assessing the situation further and seeing the car coming towards them, my husband quickly handed me our shopping bags and ran towards the scene without any hesitation. I stood behind trying to figure out what was going on and as I looked around, I saw two other gentlemen running towards the women as well, but my husband was the first at the scene so only one of the other guys came over and held the wheelchair, while my husband and the younger lady helped the elderly woman back to her chair. Luckily, by this time, the car that was coming in the parking lot saw the situation as well and stopped in front of them and got out to see if he can also lend a helping hand. Fortunately, by this time, my husband, the other woman and the third stranger all were able to safely get the situation under control and the ladies out of harms way.
When I got closer to the scene, the younger lady was apologizing profusely to everyone and explained that she wasn't paying attention so she thought she was rolling the wheelchair down the slant of the sidewalk, when in actuality she rolled her off the curb, which I guess caused the wheelchair to dip and the elderly woman to fall out into the street. My husband offered to assist in pushing the wheelchair across the parking lot, but the younger woman just kept apologizing and saying she was okay. We walked back to our car, but with a watchful eye towards the two women which now seemed to be stopped behind a bush in the parking lot, where the younger lady was assessing the elderly woman to see if she was seriously injured. My husband said that the elderly woman was yelling at the younger one and that the elderly woman was complaining about her arm, but as we pulled out and started to leave the parking lot, we looked back and seen the two women walking back towards the store, while the younger lady kept rubbing the elderly women's shoulder.
We hope that she is okay, because I know how serious even the smallest falls can be for the elderly, but for now my husband was a knight in shining amour or at least in my eyes anyway!....until next time.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
