I'm drowning as I gasp for air; all I get in return is nothing. I reach out for you, for anyone to save me, but there is nothing. All there is around me is darkness and nothingness. No hope, no salvation, no air, no nothing. When will it end? When will this agonizing pain stop? I slowly give up my fight and as I allow myself to be still, there I find my peace knowing no one will save me, no one will come, all that is left for me is to close my eyes and.........
how will this story end, you decide, should the heroin fight or just let go??
Friday, September 28, 2012
Saturday, September 22, 2012
The Puuuurrrfect Pawty
Hallo my friends! So much has happened since we last spoke, I can't wait to tell you all about it! So as you know in my previous blog, I told you all that I was going to get crazy and throw my beloved pooch a birthday Pawty and asked if anyone wanted a follow up? Some of you did message me and requested photos and I am not one to keep my readers in suspense so here it is:
The day as promised was well over 100 degrees, not to mention it was a dry heat so we were pretty miserable setting everything up as it was already 90 degrees at 9 in the morning!!!
My sister and her family were the first to arrive and nothing was set up yet, and we were still filling up our pool, but her kids couldn't wait so we just gave up at the halfway point and everyone jumped in. It wasn't a fancy party, like I said before, I was on a budget and wanted to stick to it as close as possible. We had hot dogs, we made some chili, chopped up some onions and laid out the condiments for the hot dog bar. We went to the market that day and were in luck, because they had a sale on corn which was 6 for $1 and I was like..."WHHHHAAAAAAAT?!" you don't have to tell me twice and I filled up my cart and we all got corn wasted ( it's like chocolate wasted, but with corn :P) I also bought a salad and watermelon, along with some chips so people had some options. I also had everything for the ice cream bar, but the day was soooo hot the ice cream started melting so we had to keep it in the fridge. Besides the heat, and a couple of other hiccups we had. I would say it was a pretty successful party, considering it was my first doggy party?!
As for my budget..Did I stick to it? Lets see? We had a Scooby Doo themed party, complete with Scooby Doo party packs for each guest (10 party favors), Scooby Doo tattoos and a Scooby Doo Ring Toss Game and stickers and prizes, that came out to a total of $12. Food was the most expensive, I bought 18 cobbs of corn at 6/$1 , watermelon was $5, chili beans were $8, chips $3, drinks $3, ice $10, salad $6, ice cream $6, whip cream $3, chopped peanuts $3, Fudge syrup and caramel syrup $3, popsicles $3, hot dogs $4, ice cream cones and bowls $4, so did I make my budget? I don't know; I'm horrible at math, but as long as I'm under $100 I think I did an awesome job with all things considered :P My husband was kind enough to bake the cake and cupcakes for Homer and his pals and all in all, I think it was a huge success, but I will let you all decide, here are just a couple of pictures I took on my Homers special day, hope you enjoy:
The day as promised was well over 100 degrees, not to mention it was a dry heat so we were pretty miserable setting everything up as it was already 90 degrees at 9 in the morning!!!
My sister and her family were the first to arrive and nothing was set up yet, and we were still filling up our pool, but her kids couldn't wait so we just gave up at the halfway point and everyone jumped in. It wasn't a fancy party, like I said before, I was on a budget and wanted to stick to it as close as possible. We had hot dogs, we made some chili, chopped up some onions and laid out the condiments for the hot dog bar. We went to the market that day and were in luck, because they had a sale on corn which was 6 for $1 and I was like..."WHHHHAAAAAAAT?!" you don't have to tell me twice and I filled up my cart and we all got corn wasted ( it's like chocolate wasted, but with corn :P) I also bought a salad and watermelon, along with some chips so people had some options. I also had everything for the ice cream bar, but the day was soooo hot the ice cream started melting so we had to keep it in the fridge. Besides the heat, and a couple of other hiccups we had. I would say it was a pretty successful party, considering it was my first doggy party?!
As for my budget..Did I stick to it? Lets see? We had a Scooby Doo themed party, complete with Scooby Doo party packs for each guest (10 party favors), Scooby Doo tattoos and a Scooby Doo Ring Toss Game and stickers and prizes, that came out to a total of $12. Food was the most expensive, I bought 18 cobbs of corn at 6/$1 , watermelon was $5, chili beans were $8, chips $3, drinks $3, ice $10, salad $6, ice cream $6, whip cream $3, chopped peanuts $3, Fudge syrup and caramel syrup $3, popsicles $3, hot dogs $4, ice cream cones and bowls $4, so did I make my budget? I don't know; I'm horrible at math, but as long as I'm under $100 I think I did an awesome job with all things considered :P My husband was kind enough to bake the cake and cupcakes for Homer and his pals and all in all, I think it was a huge success, but I will let you all decide, here are just a couple of pictures I took on my Homers special day, hope you enjoy:
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| this is Homer anxiously awaiting his guests arrival |
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| Everyone was getting Scooby Doo tattoos and my brother thought the birthday boy should get one too |
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| This is Homer with his first tattoo....they grow up so fast...tear ;( |
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| Homers Birthday cake, he ate a cupcake though :P |
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| Homer's pal Goose came by to wish him Happy Birthday |
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| Can't be a party without Hunter |
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| Homer's pal Ducky joined the pool party as well |
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| Homer got so many gifts <3 |
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| I think this one was his favorite... |
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| A brand new big rope to play with... |
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| I love this picture of Homer and his best friend Red |
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| They had so much fun together |
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| After a looooong hot day of partying, they finally sat down to rest <3 |
Friday, September 14, 2012
The time I pranked the whole school
Hallo, my friends around the world; how the heck are you? As for me not so great....my aunt Flo is currently visiting and whenever she comes, she makes my life a living hell!!! I feel so tired and worn out and grumpy when she comes!
Anyway, let me get to why I'm here. I was going through memory lane right now for some random reason and started remembering about the time I inadvertently pranked the whole school! I say inadvertently, because to be honest I just wanted to prank my best friend for the fun of it, but it ended up being Epic!!! So let me tell you how it all started:
I was 13 years old in Junior High School and my best friend and I would walk to and from school everyday. One day, I forgot why, but I decided it would be funny to mess with my best friend. So as you already know, I come from a BIG family of 9 brothers and sisters, so as far as space and privacy goes, you take what you can get. so for me, I slept in the closet!! Don't worry friends, it was a pretty decent sized closet with sliding doors and everything. But my dearly beloved late uncle thought that it was so inappropriate for me to sleep there, so he told me he was going to knock down the closet and give my a decent bed. I also knew that I had a doctors appointment the next day so I wouldn't be going to school; Knowing this, I pre-set the prank.
The day before my actual prank, I acted like a was so sad when my BFF picked me up for school and as we hiked the three miles, I explained about how my parents and I got into this "horrible" fight and that they said they were going to send me away to go live with my aunts, I forgot where I said; I think I told her the Phillipines or somewhere far away?! I guess I was a good actress, because she believed me. well at first she didn't, she just kept saying " shut up, quit messing with me!" But things couldn't of gone better in my evil mastermind plot, because when we walked home and got to my house, ALL of my bedroom furniture was in the front yard and there was a bunch of banging and stuff coming from inside my house. As I turned to my friend, her eyes became enlarged and started to flood with tears. " Oh my gosh, you weren't lying!!!" Don't go!" and with that she started crying. I started acting really sad and said, " there's nothing I can do, it looks like they already made up their minds, you better not come over though, because they are probably still mad and it will just get worse!" With that I hugged her goodbye and she told me to call her incase they changed their minds. On that note, I made a sad face and ran into the house. The next day as planned, I called my best friend to tell her not to come and pick me up, because I wasn't going to school. On the other end of the line I could hear her trying to hold back tears, "they made you leave?" Oh yeah, I said, "I tried to tell them I would be good, but they said they had enough and my aunt came last night and picked me up." So we hung up and I laughed to myself at how good I was getting her.
The next day I met my friend at the corner of my street and when she saw me, her eyes grew large again, but this time with joy and she ran and hugged me. " You're back!!!" As she hugged me tightly, I confessed, " we'll actually it was a joke, GOT YOU!!!" next thing I knew I was getting punched in the arm and choked, " ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!! I WAS SO SAD! I TOLD EVERYONE YOU MOVED AWAY!!!" " What are you talking about?" I said while gasping for air and rubbing my arm and neck. "Yeah, I was so sad and I told everyone you moved so everyone thinks you moved away. " Shut up!" I said, who did you tell?" I told EVERYONE, Mr. Elmonte was especially sad. I was like, " no way!" But when I got to school, I was immediately greeted with, " I thought you moved away, what are you doing here?" then when I got to my first class, which right next door to Mr. Elmontes room, I noticed Mr. Elmonte talking to my first period teacher, but his back was to me. I walked to my desk when I noticed my first period teacher look at me and a huge smile flashed on her face. She then looked at Mr. Elmonte and nodded her head towards me. As he turned around and realized she was smiling at me, a huge smile flashed on his face and excitement overcame him. " Hey, we all thought you moved away, what are you doing here??!!!" I know, I know, I've been getting that all day, I know when I'm not wanted.... " No, no, we were all so sad when we heard you moved away, you got us good!" My best friend in the back of the classroom chimed in as well, " yeah, she got me good too I'm so mad at her!!" We all started to laugh and for the next couple of days, I had students and staff members asking me, " I thought you moved, what are you doing here?!" So yeah, I guess you can say both my best friend and I got pranked and together we Both pranked the school...teehee. So that's the story about when we pranked the school, okay I'm hot and uncomfortable now, so I'm going to go try and cool off with some ice cream or something...Oh yeah tomorrow's Homers birthday party and it's going to be another scorcher ( over 100 degrees) so yeah, I'll let you now what happens tomorrow..until next time my friends......
Anyway, let me get to why I'm here. I was going through memory lane right now for some random reason and started remembering about the time I inadvertently pranked the whole school! I say inadvertently, because to be honest I just wanted to prank my best friend for the fun of it, but it ended up being Epic!!! So let me tell you how it all started:
I was 13 years old in Junior High School and my best friend and I would walk to and from school everyday. One day, I forgot why, but I decided it would be funny to mess with my best friend. So as you already know, I come from a BIG family of 9 brothers and sisters, so as far as space and privacy goes, you take what you can get. so for me, I slept in the closet!! Don't worry friends, it was a pretty decent sized closet with sliding doors and everything. But my dearly beloved late uncle thought that it was so inappropriate for me to sleep there, so he told me he was going to knock down the closet and give my a decent bed. I also knew that I had a doctors appointment the next day so I wouldn't be going to school; Knowing this, I pre-set the prank.
The day before my actual prank, I acted like a was so sad when my BFF picked me up for school and as we hiked the three miles, I explained about how my parents and I got into this "horrible" fight and that they said they were going to send me away to go live with my aunts, I forgot where I said; I think I told her the Phillipines or somewhere far away?! I guess I was a good actress, because she believed me. well at first she didn't, she just kept saying " shut up, quit messing with me!" But things couldn't of gone better in my evil mastermind plot, because when we walked home and got to my house, ALL of my bedroom furniture was in the front yard and there was a bunch of banging and stuff coming from inside my house. As I turned to my friend, her eyes became enlarged and started to flood with tears. " Oh my gosh, you weren't lying!!!" Don't go!" and with that she started crying. I started acting really sad and said, " there's nothing I can do, it looks like they already made up their minds, you better not come over though, because they are probably still mad and it will just get worse!" With that I hugged her goodbye and she told me to call her incase they changed their minds. On that note, I made a sad face and ran into the house. The next day as planned, I called my best friend to tell her not to come and pick me up, because I wasn't going to school. On the other end of the line I could hear her trying to hold back tears, "they made you leave?" Oh yeah, I said, "I tried to tell them I would be good, but they said they had enough and my aunt came last night and picked me up." So we hung up and I laughed to myself at how good I was getting her.
The next day I met my friend at the corner of my street and when she saw me, her eyes grew large again, but this time with joy and she ran and hugged me. " You're back!!!" As she hugged me tightly, I confessed, " we'll actually it was a joke, GOT YOU!!!" next thing I knew I was getting punched in the arm and choked, " ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!! I WAS SO SAD! I TOLD EVERYONE YOU MOVED AWAY!!!" " What are you talking about?" I said while gasping for air and rubbing my arm and neck. "Yeah, I was so sad and I told everyone you moved so everyone thinks you moved away. " Shut up!" I said, who did you tell?" I told EVERYONE, Mr. Elmonte was especially sad. I was like, " no way!" But when I got to school, I was immediately greeted with, " I thought you moved away, what are you doing here?" then when I got to my first class, which right next door to Mr. Elmontes room, I noticed Mr. Elmonte talking to my first period teacher, but his back was to me. I walked to my desk when I noticed my first period teacher look at me and a huge smile flashed on her face. She then looked at Mr. Elmonte and nodded her head towards me. As he turned around and realized she was smiling at me, a huge smile flashed on his face and excitement overcame him. " Hey, we all thought you moved away, what are you doing here??!!!" I know, I know, I've been getting that all day, I know when I'm not wanted.... " No, no, we were all so sad when we heard you moved away, you got us good!" My best friend in the back of the classroom chimed in as well, " yeah, she got me good too I'm so mad at her!!" We all started to laugh and for the next couple of days, I had students and staff members asking me, " I thought you moved, what are you doing here?!" So yeah, I guess you can say both my best friend and I got pranked and together we Both pranked the school...teehee. So that's the story about when we pranked the school, okay I'm hot and uncomfortable now, so I'm going to go try and cool off with some ice cream or something...Oh yeah tomorrow's Homers birthday party and it's going to be another scorcher ( over 100 degrees) so yeah, I'll let you now what happens tomorrow..until next time my friends......
Saturday, September 1, 2012
What the heck; Why not?!!
Hallo, Wie Ghet es ihnen? Здравствуйте, Доброе утро, Добрый день, Добрый вечер, 환영합니다, and all those other greetings around the world! How is everyone? As for me, I'm crazy as usual!
So you know how I've been going through a lot of things the last couple of years and since, I lost my job back in March and haven't been able to find one yet, I have been having a lot of time on my hands. Like I said in my previous blog, I have been painting, writing, gardening and just trying to find the old me, I used to be. Well, I think I am finally getting back to that crazy girl, because I have decided that I am going to throw my puppy (He is actually two years old, but just like any mother with their child, he will always be my baby) a birthday pawty!! This is totally something the old Russhelle would do, but I never had the time or the energy, because I was always too busy or stressed out from work.
This party is going to be epic! Since we are still in Summertime and it has been so hot (100 degrees or more lately), I decided to have an ice cream social! I love it, I love it, I love it, I am dancing in my seat as I type, because I am so excited! Oh hey, it just hit me; have I ever told you about my baby pup Homer? What, I never?!! I can't believe it? Well, he is a Boxer Pit mix, with a missing toe and 70 lbs of love!! He truly has been one of the greatest joys in my life! Like I said in previous blogs, I got really depressed which is why my husband got him for me and from the moment I laid eyes on him, it was love at first site <3
I remember it like yesterday, it was the end of the year in December. I was really depressed and at some points catatonic. My husband and brother didn't know how to break me out of it and then God took control and my cousin put a message on facebook about needing to find a home for this dog that literally fell in his arms. I seen pictures of him and told my husband I had to have him! My husband really didn't want to, but he seen how much I needed this and agreed to at least let me see the puppy in person. When I went to my cousins house, which was a two hour drive away, it was night time and he just peed on the floor and ran into his house because he knew he was going to get spanked. My cousin yelled at him, but I knelt down on my knees and looked into the house at this little 3 month old angel, shaking, I smiled (which is something I didn't do in awhile at the time) and gently put my hand out to him. The next thing I knew, he was jumping on me and licking my face and I started to laugh; We were at the point of no return and my husband knew it. So begrudgingly, he accepted the puppy and it has been a crazy ride since! I always wanted a big dog, but I had no idea what that would entail? Big dogs mean bigger messes and boy can HE EAT!! But over all, he has giving me joy back into my life and for that I will always be grateful for him. So now that you know why I love him so much, you know why I MUST throw him a birthday Pawty!!
So back to the fun stuff! I am going to have an ice cream bar, where guess will have their choice of ice cream cones, sundeas or banana splits. A hot dog bar where they can make either chili dogs, regular hot dogs or any other kind of dog their hearts desire and a bunch of other treats for humans and canines alike! For games, I am thinking a ring toss, tug a war with Homer and have a "Best Doggy trick" contest. Homer and I also plan to raise awareness about pet adoptions and needs at animal shelters, so I am also including in the invites that as a gift idea, they can make donations to local animal shelters in Homers name. This is my first Doggy Pawty and I just hope that it turns out as awesome as I have it planned in my head? If you guys want, I will do a follow up blog with pictures from the party...that's if you guys want, let me know through comments. Okay, I have to get back to my party planning..Oh wait, I didn't tell you the best part! So since I am unemployed, I plan to make this party as awesome and low budget as possible which is my personal challenge I gave myself. I am giving myself a budget of NO MORE THAN $60, do you guys think I can pull it off? Let's see if Russhelle can keep to her budget while throwing an awesome Ice Cream social Birthday Pawty??!!!! Until next time my friends...
this is my Homer at 1 year <3
So you know how I've been going through a lot of things the last couple of years and since, I lost my job back in March and haven't been able to find one yet, I have been having a lot of time on my hands. Like I said in my previous blog, I have been painting, writing, gardening and just trying to find the old me, I used to be. Well, I think I am finally getting back to that crazy girl, because I have decided that I am going to throw my puppy (He is actually two years old, but just like any mother with their child, he will always be my baby) a birthday pawty!! This is totally something the old Russhelle would do, but I never had the time or the energy, because I was always too busy or stressed out from work.
This party is going to be epic! Since we are still in Summertime and it has been so hot (100 degrees or more lately), I decided to have an ice cream social! I love it, I love it, I love it, I am dancing in my seat as I type, because I am so excited! Oh hey, it just hit me; have I ever told you about my baby pup Homer? What, I never?!! I can't believe it? Well, he is a Boxer Pit mix, with a missing toe and 70 lbs of love!! He truly has been one of the greatest joys in my life! Like I said in previous blogs, I got really depressed which is why my husband got him for me and from the moment I laid eyes on him, it was love at first site <3
I remember it like yesterday, it was the end of the year in December. I was really depressed and at some points catatonic. My husband and brother didn't know how to break me out of it and then God took control and my cousin put a message on facebook about needing to find a home for this dog that literally fell in his arms. I seen pictures of him and told my husband I had to have him! My husband really didn't want to, but he seen how much I needed this and agreed to at least let me see the puppy in person. When I went to my cousins house, which was a two hour drive away, it was night time and he just peed on the floor and ran into his house because he knew he was going to get spanked. My cousin yelled at him, but I knelt down on my knees and looked into the house at this little 3 month old angel, shaking, I smiled (which is something I didn't do in awhile at the time) and gently put my hand out to him. The next thing I knew, he was jumping on me and licking my face and I started to laugh; We were at the point of no return and my husband knew it. So begrudgingly, he accepted the puppy and it has been a crazy ride since! I always wanted a big dog, but I had no idea what that would entail? Big dogs mean bigger messes and boy can HE EAT!! But over all, he has giving me joy back into my life and for that I will always be grateful for him. So now that you know why I love him so much, you know why I MUST throw him a birthday Pawty!!
So back to the fun stuff! I am going to have an ice cream bar, where guess will have their choice of ice cream cones, sundeas or banana splits. A hot dog bar where they can make either chili dogs, regular hot dogs or any other kind of dog their hearts desire and a bunch of other treats for humans and canines alike! For games, I am thinking a ring toss, tug a war with Homer and have a "Best Doggy trick" contest. Homer and I also plan to raise awareness about pet adoptions and needs at animal shelters, so I am also including in the invites that as a gift idea, they can make donations to local animal shelters in Homers name. This is my first Doggy Pawty and I just hope that it turns out as awesome as I have it planned in my head? If you guys want, I will do a follow up blog with pictures from the party...that's if you guys want, let me know through comments. Okay, I have to get back to my party planning..Oh wait, I didn't tell you the best part! So since I am unemployed, I plan to make this party as awesome and low budget as possible which is my personal challenge I gave myself. I am giving myself a budget of NO MORE THAN $60, do you guys think I can pull it off? Let's see if Russhelle can keep to her budget while throwing an awesome Ice Cream social Birthday Pawty??!!!! Until next time my friends...
this is my Homer at 1 year <3
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